What Makes Me Happy?

tumblr_m762pwLNrm1rq1wr5o1_500I have been asking this to my self lately, I know I should be grateful to get a chance to live in this beautiful city but somehow things hasn’t been that great. I just feel a bit stuck at the moment. I have my good days and bad days, but when the bad days come I kept thinking to myself that I should focus on things that makes me HAPPY right?

So every time I sit in the Metro, I ask myself ‘what makes me happy?’ and thought it’s actually a difficult questions. Yes you can say things like going shopping, eating yummy food or chatting with friends but those are temporary happiness. I am happy at that moment but then I feel empty again after that moment has passed. Sometimes I feel I am not being grateful enough, maybe something is wrong with me. I try to think positively but these days its seems harder for that thought to stick. I even do my happy mantra while doing yoga, trying to send to my subconscious mind ‘be happy’ but it doesn’t work I get irritated and grumpy over small tiny matter.

Until now I am still thinking what can I do to make myself happy, because happiness comes from yourself not other people nor your surrounding. I think having all this free time to think put me into my Othoskepsis mode, I even write about it once before if you want to read it. I am aware that right now I’m in the phase of big change and accepting those changes, which can be a little difficult. But I never thought it would be this hard, as normally I am very adaptable and flexible with my surroundings. I think I just need to focus on things I want to do in life, and yet I feel so lost as I don’t know where to start. I have a clean slate, an empty book and I can do what ever I want with it but that makes it even harder to begin, no sense of directions.

Having said that I am grateful to have very supportive husband who let me do what ever I want to make me happy, friends and family who listen through my rants about stupid things but believed in me that I am going to shine with whatever I want to do. So right now I am still confused with what I want to do, hopefully the light comes soon! For now I am going to have positive thoughts and chant my mantra till that sudden burst of shiny moment pops into my head.  As the quote says I need to find something I want to do and make sure that it makes me happy!

What makes you truly happy?

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6 thoughts on “What Makes Me Happy?

  1. I know that it can be difficult being happy 100% of the time. I know that I have my moments where the voice in my head tells me I don’t deserve to be happy or I’m not good enough. I know we all have that voice. Although I know it’s not true. It’s that voice that’s kept me from doing the things I really wanted to do. I know that happiness is a choice. At any moment I’ve learned to access joy and happiness from each breathe I take or by helping other people or by practicing gratitude. Each day will always be different. I know that in order for me to grow and do the things that make me happy I have to challenge myself and do things outside of my comfort zone. Get comfortable with the discomfort. I’m sure you’ll find your way.

    • Thank you so much for your kind words and support, I am truly touch by it. I know I have to keep my chin up and charge through those challenges with open arms and as you said get comfortable with the discomfort. Great advice!

  2. Believe it or not, I know EXACTLY how you feel. It can take awhile to find what you love to do, but once you found it, it’s really worth it.
    “So keep looking and don’t give up,” 🙂

  3. Your post really resonated with me. You are definitely not alone! I moved to Paris after getting married a couple of years ago and experienced these feelings quite often. There must be something in the air here in Paris 🙂 I still go through this every once in awhile, but it’s gotten much better with time as I started to find my own rhythm and niche. Hang in there, it gets easier!

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